Ten Steps to Leveling Your Playing Field

Not all of us were born into wealthy and happy families.  A fair number of us never felt loved or appreciated as children or young adults.  Many of us never learned to love and nurture or to accept love and nurturing.  A sizable number of us have made some bad life choices which have led to divorce, firing or even a prison sentence.  The economy must also be added to our customized “blame” formula of reasons and excuses for our failures and shortcomings.  And don’t forget the politicians, the greedy capitalists, the conniving relative who got an inheritance you thought was in the bag, or the friend who stole your lover.  We have all been jilted, tilted and wilted.

When you get tired of listing everyone and everything that has gone wrong and will go south in you life, I’m ready to talk with you.  My first paragraph is a rough road map of most of my life.  Yet there was something still stirring in me as I reached my forties.   Unsuccessful in every meaningful way to me, I secretly dreamed of being a hero and standing before a million people in love.  That something whispered to me that I am resilient, extremely intelligent and on the verge of greatness.  Some called my dreams delusions of grandeur.

Nothing in my world seemed to justify my hopes and aspirations for greatness.  Now I am in my fifties, 90 pounds lighter and fit.  Everyday I am writing and trying to touch lives with honesty, hope and action.  At 56 years old next week, I want to stand before you and say that life ain’t over until you stop trying.  I want to stand before you and say you are special – maybe spectacular – and nobody or nothing is standing in your path other than your own shadow of doubt.

With great reverence for the uniqueness and divinity in you, please accept my ten-step formula for finally standing tall and throwing away the crutches of failure and despair:

1) Read or learn to read.  Anything and everything you assimilate can stimulate your mind and put you into a problem-solving trance.

2) Walk on the other side of the street.  This activity will help to give you a new set of eyes.

3) Look to the heavens three times a day.  Rejoice that you are alive, that a day has been granted to you, and that the heavens, just like your life, are expansive and breathtaking.

4) Respect people by letting them finish their thoughts.  The quickest way to isolation is to be a dominant, know-it-all who chops off other people’s sentences and imposes your values and viewpoints in order to look smart and intelligent.

5) Find the lesson rather than dwell on the failure or failing.  To dwell means to live in a time warp which leaves you powerless and unable to make necessary adjustments for success.  Be aware of this trap and avoid it at all costs.

6) Breathe.  Hello?  Most of us are shallow breathers.  We don’t bring in sufficient oxygen to the brain for maximum alertness.  Breathe deeply…and deep thoughts and revolutionary concepts will appear from within and without.

7) Refrain from eating foods which make you sluggish and provide scant nutrition.  Would you pour sugar into your car’s gas tank?   Methinks not.  Put high octane food into your body.  I call it the 80-20 formula, eighty percent water-based foods and twenty percent healthy, solid foods of any variety.

Try one new activity every week.  If you can’t draw, start today.  If you can’t build a website, get on it.  If you can’t find a mate, ask someone for dinner.  Open your world to the delicious realm of possibilities.

9) Keep a diary of your accomplishments, your thoughts, your doubts, and your dreams.  Watch yourself grow from day to day.

10) Write down your goals in very specific terms.  If a pilot says he wants to go to North America, that’s a start.  But if he doesn’t have a destination, he will likely crash.  Goals are the road signs as we march toward our divine purpose on this planet.  Trust me, you do have a special purpose waiting to be discovered.